TAMPA (The Borowitz Report)—Calling the availability a “violation of particular person freedom,” a federal choose in Florida has dominated that airways can not require passengers to have tickets.
Decide Kathryn Kimball Mizelle mentioned that she got here to her choice after discovering that america Structure makes “no reference by any means” to airline tickets.
“The Framers of the Structure clearly needed to stop the infringement of Individuals’ proper to board any airplane they need,” the Trump appointee mentioned. “And so I hereby carry the ticket mandate.”
As a part of her ruling, Mizelle barred the airways from giving seat assignments, calling that apply a violation of the First Modification’s enshrinement of “freedom of sitting.”
The pilot of an airliner travelling from Denver to Chicago introduced Mizelle’s choice in mid-flight on Wednesday, inflicting passengers to erupt in applause and wrestle for seats in first-class.
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